20: Mind Over Matter

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Synopsis
Worried that Stuckeybowl might not outlast him, Ed wants the bowling alley designated as a landmark that will preserve its recreational status forever while he represents an arthritic friend (guest star Ray Aranha) who was hornswoggled when he unknowingly shelled out big money for sugar pills from a doctor (guest star Jamie Goodwin). Elsewhere, Molly chills her promising new relationship with a hunk (guest star David Eigenberg) when she learns that her beau had first asked out Carol, while Ed welcomes a group of oldtimers who annually rent out the lanes for a reunion.

Overview
Ed worries that Stuckeybowl will not be around forever when a bowling alley in nearby Jaspertown is turned into a mini-self-storage. He decides to go to the town council and have Stuckeybowl declared a landmark. They turn down his first petition, so Ed digs deeper and discovers that while Stuckeybowl is not historically or architecturally significant, the people who have frequented Stuckeybowl over the years make it significant. The town council agrees. Ed takes on a doctor who is charging arthritic clients $85/week for a placebo. He learns of the practice when former Badass Cowboy Harry Lackmather comes in with the pills, which Mike analyzes. When more people step forward, Ed decides they have grounds for a class action lawsuit. Molly and Jeff go on their first date, where Jeff reveals that he asked Carol out first. Molly gets upset, even when Jeff explains that he`s glad to be with Molly instead of Carol. Molly and Carol argue about their lives, and Molly brushes Jeff off.

Songs "Falling in Love" - Randy Newman At close of episode, as the gang celebrated Stuckeybowl`s landmark status "Just a Gigolo" - Louis Prima While "old-timers" had their midnight bowling party Trivia Ten Bucks Mike bets Ed ten bucks to yell "I love kitties!" at the top of his lungs in the bowling alley. (Ed up $40) Legal Update Ed prosecutes a class action law suit against Dr. Kendall, who is charging his patients $85/week for a placebo to cure their arthritis. Although the placebo works, the judge finds the sheer mark up price to be fraudulent and rules in favor of Ed`s clients. Ed`s record as a lawyer is now 9-5 with 4 settlements and one non-completion of duty. Fine Food and Drink Carol offers the architectural specialist some root beer. Stubbs Schemes Phil tells Harry he "knows a guy" who can get the generic brand of hexamyacin--the guy turns out to be Mike Burton. Molly later spies Phil at the MENSA meeting, pretending to be Dr. Sittula and amazing a pretty young woman with his speculations about M.C. Escher. Phil also does his best to help Stuckeybowl become architecturally significant by trying to install flying buttresses.

Quotes "Which do you think you could make more money off of: a talking dog or a flying dog?" - Shirley Pifko (to Kenny) "Don't even talk to this one in the morning till he's had his second cup of joe." - Phil Stubbs (to Harry re Ed) "It's so much fun to wind him up and watch him go." - Dr. Mike Burton (re: Ed, who decides to get landmark status for Stuckeybowl) "You've obviously never experienced the boyishly convincing smile of Edward J. Stevens." - Ed Stevens (on how to charm the town council) "Your hippie friend is very perceptive." - Dr. Walter Jerome (re Phil) "I want to sue him so bad till he bleeds through his head." - Harry Lackmather (re Dr. Kendall) "I have the IQ of a golf ball." - Molly Hudson (on why she never joined MENSA) "Stuckeybowl, Stuckeyville. Don't tell me that's a coincidence!" - Ed Stevens (in his first woefully unprepared plea to the town council) "This shoe counter serves as an ironic commentary on roundness." - Ed Stevens (to the architectural expert) "You know, by the Tricentennial, we'll all be dead." - Kenny Sandusky () "Hey, guys! Hey, you gotta see this! Kenny's about to stop a bowling ball with his head!" - Dr. Mike Burton (to Ed and Carol, who are sitting on the roof) Pop Culture References MENSA Jeopardy Remington Steele Highlights Magazine for Children R. C. Cola Pulitzer M. C. Escher Denny`s Restaurants Erin Brockovich